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Monday 18 September 2017

Poignant memories combined with sincerest birthday greetings Jeannette! (Article)


By Stanley Collymore

Those distant days we made our own have literally flown by and the several years that inevitably they’ve given rise to have harmoniously coalesced into an enterprisingly beautiful and kaleidoscopic reservoir of supremely rich, fondly enlivening and unquestionably note worthily delightful and enduring memories of you and me.

Memories that on reliving them in my mind their stimulating experiences instantaneously and quite vividly roll back the years to those halcyon days first initiated in the blissfully conducive, romantically mesmerizing and truthfully exhilarating environs of Rebecca’s Discotheque in Reading, Berkshire where we first met, where courtship and romance were spontaneously triggered and, shortly afterwards, companionably blossomed into a specifically, truly animated, passionate and a reciprocally loving relationship.

But Fate, alas, and the private circumstances at the time that we were both in: you a married lady, though unhappily so, and with a young family affectionately in tow; myself having just a couple of years previously got divorced and still in the process of shaking off that erstwhile calamity – jointly conspired and, moreover, regrettably succeeded, adequately assisted by the clearly challenging situation we were undoubtedly in, in scuppering the further progression of the propitiously amorous but nevertheless, by any unbiased prospect or optimistic deduction, the truthfully embryonic relationship between the two of us.

Evidently, it wasn’t what either of us honestly wanted but, all the same, we had to face facts and the glaring reality of knowing precisely what the devastating impact of your split from their father would have on your two adorable children whom I’d met, and so for the overall good of them and despite us being very much in love with each other we were none the less starkly aware of both the moral and practical dilemma we were jointly in. And with neither of us enthusiastically in favour of indefinitely or surreptitiously carrying on with an illicit love affair we painfully but honourably and mutually decided to bring our personal relationship to an opportune end.

Soon afterwards and thankfully as a necessary assuagement from the searing pain which we both felt within, following our brave but pragmatic decision, I decided in consultation with you to take the offered opportunity presented to me and migrate from England to Germany; and the rest as they say is history.

Eventually, though, the deliberate termination of our amorous relationship coupled with the now locational separation that we’d thoughtfully, consciously and selflessly placed between us, enforcedly, and principally it’s true to say from you and painstakingly so for the sake of your children, had a determinedly remedial effect on the state of your marriage in a number of ways. While for my part, providentially ensconced, as I was, in my new and romantically unblemished environment and with the final remnants of my marriage baggage thoroughly and permanently dispensed with, I too was ready for a new start.

A situation that was further strengthened by the excellent and comforting news that the interminable and seemingly intractable problems you were relentlessly having and were themselves grimly compelling you in the given circumstances to genuinely want to leave your husband were it not most agonizingly for the threatened instability, which was possible as a result of you doing so, to be caused to your children. Problems that were occasioned in full previous to your first meeting me, continued thereafter, other than for those short-lived occasions of respite favourably granted to us and them when we were alone together, and whose heedless indifference to them your insensitive husband, bearing in mind that it was him who was directly responsible for initiating and sustaining them, were at last with your final ultimatum to him and itself coupled with his belated realization that his ongoing and distinctly unsatisfactory conduct seriously advanced the genuine prospect of him losing his children, sharply focused his mind on the dire situation he was clearly in and accordingly what was absolutely required of him if realistically he expected to remain a part of your family.

Ultimatums, I know, can be and generally are very unpleasant and even disturbing experiences for those persons forced to be on the receiving end of them, but used sparingly, objectively, wisely and with largely altruistic pursuits in mind by the user of them can suitably and most beneficially, as you well understood Jeannette, be a great fillip and a tremendous force for good, as sensibly they justifiably ought to be. And your astute knowledge of the latter, my Dear, in that specific regard was then and still is most outstandingly exemplary.

In the interim, however, your well-cared for children have in a glowing tribute to you, admirably grown up, are all gone having left home to pursue their own individual ambitions in life; and you the once quite despairingly fraught mother with understandable anguish for them, and of course yourself, have magically been transformed into a truly optimistic and commendable wife.

Someone no longer enforcedly stuck in the past while justly dreading the outcome of the future, but instead a remarkably changed woman in every way, who with boundless optimism and renewed vigour now earnestly looked forward to each new day that dawned. And with that cheerfully in mind and for your special day, Friday the 22nd September 2017, I would proudly like to say all the very best to you my Dear and, of course, wish you a most magnificent, happy and an unforgettable landmark birthday.

Marriage is an estate that not everyone who enters it is suited for or does so with the best of intentions in mind, and not infrequently those intentions that are therefore either concertedly and premeditatedly or even enthusiastically and gratuitously engaged in can quite purposely in nature be surreptitiously malevolent and wilfully inimical to the overall beneficial interests and general welfare of the unsuspecting person who unwittingly and unwarrantedly ends up as the consciously chosen victim of the concertedly evil machinations that specific individual who fraudulently and quite disastrously but, all the same, most influentially for their perverse, selfish and utterly demented reasons talked their way into their target’s life.

And while there’s absolutely no sure-fire way or method to totally eradicate such pernicious incursions into one’s personal life, strict vigilance maintained throughout the initial stages at least of one venturing into an intimate relationship with another person can and does help. As does effectively employing the quite sensible mantra of not taking everything that you’re told for granted or at face value because you’re simply either hopelessly in love, or are even worst still manipulatively, as it happens, controlled into thinking that this ostensibly advantageously permitted entrant into your personal life is unquestionably everything you could possibly and most beneficially hope for. Don’t willingly fall for any of that and always let caution be your personal byword.

And in the interim good luck and continued happiness in your choice of partner should you after serious thought responsibly decide to embark on your personal marital adventure.

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