Friday, 23 October 2015

More Orgasms Not Less I Say! And Why Not Have A National Orgasm Day?

By Stanley Collymore

I was once haplessly obliged to overhear, as was everyone
else on that public omnibus to Worthing, a rather loud
monologue debilitatingly pretty annoying because
it was actually so mindlessly uninspiring but
nevertheless continuously went on apace
while risibly passing itself off as
a conversation when nothing
of the kind, I freely admit, could
have been further removed in
logical terms from the utter
grandstanding and wind-
bawling pursuit of
this incredibly

The subject she was distinctly and obsessively
concerned with, as was quite obvious to all
of us from the very beginning and who
unfortunately were ensconced with
her throughout our journey on
that No.23 public transport
bus owned and operated
by the regional company Metrobus was sex,
which this woman clearly had a problem
with but apparently didn’t see things
that way, making it abundantly clear
in her distinctly ostentatious and
what transparently for her was
also emphatically passed off
as an objective discourse, that by no stretch
of anyone’s imagination was she a fan,
or could ever be influenced to be, of
sexual intercourse and much less
so the personal indulgence of
being plausibly prevailed
upon by anybody, man
or woman, to having
sexually induced
orgasms which
plainly were
out of that

And while she grudgingly conceded that Nature’s perverse
and extremely challenging interventions, as she perceives
some sexual inclinations to be, do at times cause that
unfortunately chosen individual to prioritize and
regrettably out of carnal necessity indulge in
sexually relieving themselves occasionally
in such given situations; all the same,
she emphatically stated, their prevalence
disturbingly compounded by the well known physical and
moral dangers of such extravagances ought not to be
cavalierly understated in the maddening rush to
get one’s self sexually mated, but should
instead be most sagaciously and self-
controllably in every conceivable
fashion be seen as a cancerous
curse or even worst and never tolerated let alone
willingly encouraged simply for the sake of
gratuitously having what are very often
overrated and, especially for women
having sex with men, invariably
impossible to achieve, quite
uneventful and regularly
resulting in generally
embarrassing and
shrewdly faked,

© Stanley V. Collymore
23 October 2015.

Author’s Remarks:
This passenger, of course, was and is entitled to her personal points of view and while I support her entitlement to express them in an appropriate forum I nevertheless don’t subscribe to any one frequently unprovoked in any way stridently, and most unconcernedly for the sensitivity or the right to travel peaceably on a public mode of transport and who just as intrinsically is entitled to that right having such rights callously and or narcissistically usurped by others with a particular bee in their bonnet.

That said, and even though this woman’s arguments were manifestly skewed by God alone knows what and that’s not for me to decipher as I didn’t know her and even though she was making a profound nuisance of herself it wasn’t me that she was directly addressing but in effect all of us who were basically involuntarily trapped on that bus with her, there were some points that she made that were nevertheless valid I thought. But that’s my opinion and you’re perfectly and at will entitled to yours after reading this poem.

What I would say though is this, that there appears to be a very disconcerting and increasingly as well irritating phenomenon pervading large tracts of the UK where people with little of substance to say and regardless of whether or not anyone wants to hear let alone actually listen to what they decide to unthinkingly regurgitate from within their generally purblind minds, automatically think that they have a dispensation to do precisely that.

And other than the restriction of sex effectively used as a tool to prevent more of their kind being insidiously produced, I really don’t see why the curtailment of a rather practical and highly efficient means of continuing a particular species and that generally is most pleasurable as well should be inhibited.

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